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FWAG; Playground; Multitasking; Pub Conundrums

Published: Tuesday, November 2, 2010

FWAG Conference
Last week my wife and I went to the AGM of FWAG (Farming and Wildlife Advisory Group). I gave a talk on Penlan Farm and how we are integrating our main business, farm business, moist food manufacture and our conservation work. I had a 10 minute slot which was not really enough time but all other speakers only had 5 minutes so I suppose I can claim to have been the keynote speaker.

The event took place on (one of) the Duke of Westminster’s estates. I’m not saying he’s a big landowner but the estate manager pointed out that among the Duke’s various properties he has 100,000 acres in Scotland which is used solely for recreational purposes.

Yesterday two of the staff commented that I was eating my breakfast (toast) while walking to work. I don’t do uni-tasking; I always multitask, unlike former US President Gerald Ford, of whom it was said that he couldn’t walk and chew gum at the same time.

Still with US presidents, in a caption about potato, yesterday’s Independent used the George Bush spelling which is “potatoe”.

Pub Conundrums
In the pub on Friday a smartypants tried to bamboozle us with the answerable (to him) question “Why do we never see chalk-coloured dog crap as we used to?” 
It’s simple enough – it’s because dogs don’t have bones as they used to.

The same person then asked “What is the connection between marriage and a deck of cards?
Answer – you start off with a diamond and two hearts and end up looking for a club and a spade!
I wish I’d had that one for my speech at our daughter’s recent wedding.

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